Love and Death in Katmnadu

                                          

When I first saw the book sitting on my dad's bookshelf at home several years ago, I thought to myself do I really want to read another version of the same story? So every time I went back home I'd skip past Love and Death in Kathmandu and look for something new. This time when I went back, however, I felt somewhat drawn to the book; and so I told myself I'd give it a try. 

In many ways the story was what I had expected and one that I had heard many times before. But the book also brought back images of events I never thought had really registered in my mind; it evoked feelings that I hadn't realized I could feel about the massacre.

The first bit was a recap into the history or Nepal- an explaination of the culture, significance of people, places and days in as a simple way as possible. It was interesting to see this from the outside- from someone who hadn't been immersed in the culture that it became a part of life. Though there were a few things that I wasn't quite sure if it was fully accurate or not... But I won't get to nitty gritty on those details. And I must admit, I still don't understand the history of the Ranas, Shahs and PMs and will be waiting for the day it gets turned into a tv series or movie of some sort! 

What really intrigued me, however, were the interviews with people who's names I'd heard through conversations during family gatherings and in the media. And images from events from back then started popping up in my mind as I was reading. But I think the most vivid memories that were evoked were of funeral procession of the King and Queen and the broadcast of a single tune on nearly every media channel.

While this book isn't one of, what I would call, my favourites, it surely is one that has made quite an impression on me. And I that has more to do with how it has conjured up images and feelings that I had forgotten as well as made me feel and think about the royal family, massacre and their effects on the general public in Nepal. 

Something to Make You Go Hmmm....

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.

Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.

Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who have a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are. Even if he has has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending... Compromise is two way street. You need time to heal between relationships. There is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new
relationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you. A relationship consists of two WHOLE
individuals. Look for someone complimentary...
not supplementary.

Dating is fun... Even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes... When a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him ~ he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phil says... You should know that: You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one. They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one. Ladies take care of your own hearts..

By: Oprah Winfrey
Source: Facebook Post that someone 'Shared'